Blood-soaked hands never smelt this good

Prayers.

In the death of the night, prayers ring out, silent, and not spoken.

Prayers, praying and hoping for the best for those everywhere.

Yet, some people just don't deserve such prayers.

So much so, prayers are wasted.

But do not fret, my friend, for these aren't really wasted.

Instead, they are a curse. To those who never knew they were so blessed to have others praying for their well-being.

Because they will never understand the real meaning behind those words of blessing, for they are so full of themselves.

"She who should be shot, should be left to rot. Amen."

Interestingly enough, we, those whom Gods have forsaken and forgotten, can never have enough reign over the curse of others. That, is because we were never evil to begin with. However, we will never be evil just to prove our point.

It's stupid, to kill our morals and integrity for the sake of you poor idiotic souls.

Therefore you, shall be your own death.

"Birds of a feather, flock together."

Idiots like you will never mix with others of different personalities except that of yours. Thus, you will only be trapped in your own world, swimming in your own thoughts of happiness.

Happiness? You must be kidding right? Because you will only be faced with illusions.

Roam, free as you think you are, but foolishness will bring you back down to Earth. Your every move and every word is observed and noted, deep behind the shadows.

And now, you will be killed.

There are many ways to ruin a person, though it seems you know all the ways. Tough luck though, you don't, because you are a mere idiot.

Pitiful? Nah, you deserve it alright.

If you were to stand in front of me the next time, I will inflict pain on you.

Don't worry, call on your other friends to help you if you want, but trust me, I wouldn't leave a trace of evidence anywhere. Instead, I will get others on my side to prove my innocence.

Despicable? No, you are the despicable one, for you were the one who bit me first.

It's time I take my revenge. I will make it a sweet experience for me, and a bitter one for you.

You know what? You are a major disgrace to your ancestors. Because you think you are so high-class, you have forgotten your roots. You know nothing much of your mother tongue nor your dialect.

Sad...

Beginning and Ending

A new year has started...

A new beginning.

My life revolves around me and myself only nowadays.

I, am glad. Because through this way, at least people will forget about me and go on with their new lives. I'm no longer a burden to anyone anymore.

Interestingly though, I'm not depressed nor suicidal in any way at all.

Again, some one 'betrayed' me. I've not replied to her message in any way, because I'm just wasting my own time in the end. Instead, I deleted it without a second thought. I don't need her as a friend anyway. In fact, I do not need anyone to be my friend.

I've forgotten what it was to be happy or sad anyway.

Whatever feelings that I show each day on my face, I ain't even sure if I'm truly feeling that way after all.

That's because I've learnt not to show my true feelings out, because I fear...

I fear I would be hurt once more.

Yesterday, I handed over a letter which I wrote personally to my CCA secretary. My vice-chairman saw it, and asked me why I never wrote her one. I told her, I will, but it would be so much longer, in that case would you still want it and she replied yes.

In actual fact, I don't even know what I would writing after all.

When I picked up the pen and begin to write, I wrote what I thought of.

Even though sadness overwhelms me whenever I think of the events.
But there will never be tears shed. There's no use in crying after all.
Even if I were to cry, who would understand my tears?
Even if I were to say out loud, who would understand my situation?

I'm just merely a tormented soul lost in a big world. I fear death, but wish for death to come some times. Do you know why?

God, seemingly has no grace for us poor souls.

When I went back to the place which had filled me with horrid memories, I am greatly surprised, that teachers remember us because we had our say in the way we ran our CCA. The teachers were impressed, with what we did and how it turned out to be.

So what? After all, we would merely be buried in time and history for we no longer exists in the school's history.

In that case, why remember?

Though four years were difficult to pass, I have to agree that I'm glad that some good things come out of it after all. Yet, all this good things have come to an end after all:

1) To the friends and 'comrades', everyone would have had a new beginning. As such, surge on forward and do not look back anymore.
2) To the teacher who had faith in us, at least we are no longer a burden to you because you would not have to take charge of us anymore.

Our story, has come to an ending. We exist no more. Thus, move on forward and do not dwell on the past at all. Instead, let me, the foolish one to stay in all this memories.

Because I still have a cause in all these misery. But you don't.

I've said this before, and I'll say it again.

"I'm my own controllor in the way I run my life."

"Shine on this life that's burning out"